Wow, it's good to be home. The first place we visited was the Rho Upsilon chapter of TKE. All the brothers including mine sleep above the ceiling in the crawl space.
The legendary Gorrell was at the college gym getting ready for California, where he'll live in a beach town and try his hand at whatever comes his way. Word has it he may get knee surgery out there.
We stopped by Great Clips and got the 7-2 and the 8-3. And since we were so close, we ate at Mi Pueblo. Turns out big Jeff doesn't like Mexican these days. He used to eat the wet burrito, and now he orders taco salad with the dairy products on the side.
After dinner we stopped by to check out the hot rods on Main Street. Keith's Mach 1 was parked in front of the Willard, so we said what's up. We stayed for a while and then went home.
Friday, August 26, 2011
Friday, August 19, 2011
jeremy dillow
Dillow was the funniest kid in the seventh grade. He called me double J, and I called him Dillow.
Turned out our grandpas lived near each other out in Bargersville. One day we went fishing on his grandpa's pond. Didn't catch much but we had a pretty good mud fight, and that's about as close as life ever got to the book Harris and Me.
After all these years, it was good to run in to him at the bars one night last summer. You know, it's said the mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation, but Dillow's not very quiet. He's just a good hombre.
Turned out our grandpas lived near each other out in Bargersville. One day we went fishing on his grandpa's pond. Didn't catch much but we had a pretty good mud fight, and that's about as close as life ever got to the book Harris and Me.
After all these years, it was good to run in to him at the bars one night last summer. You know, it's said the mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation, but Dillow's not very quiet. He's just a good hombre.
Thursday, August 18, 2011
jeremy rushton and his sister
Look, there are just some people. For instance, Jeremy Rushton.
Don't get me wrong, he never offended me personally. But hear a few stories about him and then decide for yourself.
Like the time he showed us how he could suck air in his ass and fart on command. Or how about the time he broke up a good, serious fight between a couple guys with a suplex from left field? Or ask someone about that time he was pinching his sister's chest parts in the weight room during track practice.
Decide for yourself. All I'm saying is I had my share and that was plenty.
Don't get me wrong, he never offended me personally. But hear a few stories about him and then decide for yourself.
Like the time he showed us how he could suck air in his ass and fart on command. Or how about the time he broke up a good, serious fight between a couple guys with a suplex from left field? Or ask someone about that time he was pinching his sister's chest parts in the weight room during track practice.
Decide for yourself. All I'm saying is I had my share and that was plenty.
Wednesday, August 17, 2011
jeremy chin(s)
Remember that big piece of lard Jeremy Chin? That kid had a real mean streak and he stunk, too. Stunk like bad foot odor, to be honest.
Remember how during gym class he laid belly down on the wrestling mats, and it took ten kids to drag his dead weight out of the ring? All the while Mr. Wingler yelled at him to bend over and take it like a man. What a riot.
Last I ever knew of Chin he didn't have a lot going for him. Other than going home to Kentucky.
Remember how during gym class he laid belly down on the wrestling mats, and it took ten kids to drag his dead weight out of the ring? All the while Mr. Wingler yelled at him to bend over and take it like a man. What a riot.
Last I ever knew of Chin he didn't have a lot going for him. Other than going home to Kentucky.
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
736-SIGN
One summer Mom helped me land a graveyard shift job delivering Yard Signs part time for $12 an hour. The full time guy, Henri, was half-Belgian and a little unusual besides. That should have been clear from the moment he said he liked working nights...
I liked him alright, though. The first night he showed me the ropes. First, how to wrap custom-print banner messages around the 3X6 foot two-ply corrugated plastic boards. Next, how to organize the pickup and delivery invoices and map out the night's route. Then how to load the truck, making sure there aren't too many or too few of each of the 5 pieces of iron necessary to build a stand.
Each stand is 2 base bars, 2 vertical bars, and an h-bar, which brings it together. Finally Henri taught me the meticulous craft sliding a man-sized sign over top a stand.
Remember, half the jobs are pickups, so you'll be getting some extra pieces as you go. And don't forget to stake the whole thing down with streamers. Any questions?
How long does each job take?
15-30 minutes
How many jobs a night?
Sometimes 12, sometimes 30 to 35.
So what time do you get done?
When you finish all the invoices and unload the truck. Usually, say, maybe 5am. Ha ha... 9 to 5, right?
What if I need to put gas in the truck?
Company credit card above the sun visor.
What if I get lost?
There's an atlas under the seat. Boss lady puts MapQuest maps on the ones with weird directions. If you're in big trouble, call boss lady and boss man. But only if you really need to!
What nights will I work?
I go to motorcycle rallies on Tuesdays. You can do Tuesday and Wednesday. And I'm going to Indiana Beach for 4th of July. You can be full time that week.
Now, while it was Mom who helped land the job, she's the last person to consider the mad shit that happens when a teenage kid erects signs in front lawns in the dead of night. If she knew, she'd lose years off her life. So for the sake of her health and clear conscience, do us a favor, and let's keep Yard Signs stories a secret from her.
I liked him alright, though. The first night he showed me the ropes. First, how to wrap custom-print banner messages around the 3X6 foot two-ply corrugated plastic boards. Next, how to organize the pickup and delivery invoices and map out the night's route. Then how to load the truck, making sure there aren't too many or too few of each of the 5 pieces of iron necessary to build a stand.
Each stand is 2 base bars, 2 vertical bars, and an h-bar, which brings it together. Finally Henri taught me the meticulous craft sliding a man-sized sign over top a stand.
Remember, half the jobs are pickups, so you'll be getting some extra pieces as you go. And don't forget to stake the whole thing down with streamers. Any questions?
How long does each job take?
15-30 minutes
How many jobs a night?
Sometimes 12, sometimes 30 to 35.
So what time do you get done?
When you finish all the invoices and unload the truck. Usually, say, maybe 5am. Ha ha... 9 to 5, right?
What if I need to put gas in the truck?
Company credit card above the sun visor.
What if I get lost?
There's an atlas under the seat. Boss lady puts MapQuest maps on the ones with weird directions. If you're in big trouble, call boss lady and boss man. But only if you really need to!
What nights will I work?
I go to motorcycle rallies on Tuesdays. You can do Tuesday and Wednesday. And I'm going to Indiana Beach for 4th of July. You can be full time that week.
Now, while it was Mom who helped land the job, she's the last person to consider the mad shit that happens when a teenage kid erects signs in front lawns in the dead of night. If she knew, she'd lose years off her life. So for the sake of her health and clear conscience, do us a favor, and let's keep Yard Signs stories a secret from her.
Monday, August 15, 2011
it's all good
Wow, I saw a lot of friendly faces around the neighborhood today... the military woman whose cocker spaniel looks like a giant tarantula...the gentleman who shouts "let's go" and "come on" on the treadmill... the ponytailed chick with a swimmer's body... the Eastern European lifeguard... the mail carrier... and Jefferson.
Sunday, August 14, 2011
also known as driftwood river
Tell you a little something about Sugar Creek, the darling stream of Central Indiana.
It's waters take form south of the farm town Markleville and steadily work their way south and west as you can imagine all do in the Hoosier State.
After passing through New Palestine, it runs just west of downtown Boggstown and then east of Needham, where an old mill sits sunk underwater. Several miles down is the site of Smiley's Mill, built around 1820 by John Smiley, first sheriff of Johnson County.
Along it's way, Sugar Creek gathers strength from it's dirty cousin, Young's Creek. And with a rejuvenated pace, it flows toward a union with the hearty Big Blue River in Edinburgh. The progeny is the East Fork of the White River, on which Columbus -- once voted the 6th greatest architectural city in the nation -- was built.
From there, the water sweeps westward toward the famed Wabash. Now the Wabash, you may know, is the final major tributary to the Ohio before the Ohio pours into Twain's Mississippi.
Though not much used today, Sugar Creek once powered a handful of mills vital to the settlers living on it. A little ways up from the banks, at the foot of weather worn headstones, those same settlers now rest in weed filled cemeteries. Meanwhile their children's grandchildren's great grandchildren still toil over the land surrounding the pretty little waterway.
So you see how Hoosier sweat and tears come to carry fertile soil all the way down to New Orleans and on into the Gulf.
It's waters take form south of the farm town Markleville and steadily work their way south and west as you can imagine all do in the Hoosier State.
After passing through New Palestine, it runs just west of downtown Boggstown and then east of Needham, where an old mill sits sunk underwater. Several miles down is the site of Smiley's Mill, built around 1820 by John Smiley, first sheriff of Johnson County.
Along it's way, Sugar Creek gathers strength from it's dirty cousin, Young's Creek. And with a rejuvenated pace, it flows toward a union with the hearty Big Blue River in Edinburgh. The progeny is the East Fork of the White River, on which Columbus -- once voted the 6th greatest architectural city in the nation -- was built.
From there, the water sweeps westward toward the famed Wabash. Now the Wabash, you may know, is the final major tributary to the Ohio before the Ohio pours into Twain's Mississippi.
Though not much used today, Sugar Creek once powered a handful of mills vital to the settlers living on it. A little ways up from the banks, at the foot of weather worn headstones, those same settlers now rest in weed filled cemeteries. Meanwhile their children's grandchildren's great grandchildren still toil over the land surrounding the pretty little waterway.
So you see how Hoosier sweat and tears come to carry fertile soil all the way down to New Orleans and on into the Gulf.
Saturday, August 13, 2011
restaurant review
Did you know there are Brazilian steakhouses where servers carve meat for you at your table?
Did you know there's the chain of Brazilian steakhouses called Texas de Brazil?
Did you know there's a Texas de Brazil at Fair Oaks Mall?
Did you know there's a server at that restaurant named Alexa?
Did you know there's blue eye shadow on Alexa's lids to match her server's shirt?
Bet you didn't.
Did you know there's the chain of Brazilian steakhouses called Texas de Brazil?
Did you know there's a Texas de Brazil at Fair Oaks Mall?
Did you know there's a server at that restaurant named Alexa?
Did you know there's blue eye shadow on Alexa's lids to match her server's shirt?
Bet you didn't.
Friday, August 12, 2011
poached eggs and thick cut bacon
Wow, almost puked this morning while thinking about how much reading and writing online blow. Then I sucked it up and went to work.
When I got home, we had poached eggs with Hollandaise and thick cut bacon. Some of the egg yolk got on the couch pillow and the dog licked it up. Better him than me.
When I got home, we had poached eggs with Hollandaise and thick cut bacon. Some of the egg yolk got on the couch pillow and the dog licked it up. Better him than me.
Thursday, August 11, 2011
mint condition ipad
Wow, today worked out alright. Started off by nicking my neck a couple times with a cheap safety razor. Then I made the mistake of listening to Evil Urges, a real egg of an album.
Things got better when Goose offered me the peppers from his italian sub. And better still when I let the girl at the burger joint know she looks like Sarah Silverman. Good to finally get that off my chest.
For fun at night, we went to a rooftop bar. On the way to the elevator a fella asked how much we'd pay for his never-even-taken-out-of-the-box iPad. I offered him $150. His buddy said what do you think this is, Vietnam?
Nah brah, it's just the rooftop bar.
Things got better when Goose offered me the peppers from his italian sub. And better still when I let the girl at the burger joint know she looks like Sarah Silverman. Good to finally get that off my chest.
For fun at night, we went to a rooftop bar. On the way to the elevator a fella asked how much we'd pay for his never-even-taken-out-of-the-box iPad. I offered him $150. His buddy said what do you think this is, Vietnam?
Nah brah, it's just the rooftop bar.
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
tubey tommy
Remember old Tubey Tommy? He was a good guy.
Turned out to be pretty good on the mound from what I heard. Then he got into trouble with the law. Rumor has it he now has a kid or two.
I recall how he claimed he could get any girl, he just didn't feel like it. And how he predicted both of Ohio State's interceptions seconds before they happened in the 2003 Fiesta Bowl. I liked that guy. Liked the way he thought.
I liked his brother Charles too. He was a habitual winker and a pool shark.
Turned out to be pretty good on the mound from what I heard. Then he got into trouble with the law. Rumor has it he now has a kid or two.
I recall how he claimed he could get any girl, he just didn't feel like it. And how he predicted both of Ohio State's interceptions seconds before they happened in the 2003 Fiesta Bowl. I liked that guy. Liked the way he thought.
I liked his brother Charles too. He was a habitual winker and a pool shark.
Friday, July 22, 2011
July 22, 2011
(5:00:03 PM) Whitney: what are we going to do tonight?
(5:00:14 PM) Jared: everything
(5:00:15 PM) Jared: twice
(5:00:14 PM) Jared: everything
(5:00:15 PM) Jared: twice
Wednesday, June 8, 2011
June 8, 2011
My favorite memory from Atlanta is the flight back. An incredible babe named Kelley was sitting next to me. She was easy to talk to and easier on the eyes. Things were good until she asked if I had any roommates.
But that's OK. Apparently she has a boyfriend Zach. Saved by the fasten your seatbelts bell.
But that's OK. Apparently she has a boyfriend Zach. Saved by the fasten your seatbelts bell.
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
June 7, 2011
One of my favorite memories from Atlanta is how the World of Coke tour makes you think of better days gone by.
Monday, June 6, 2011
June 6, 2011
One of my favorite memories from Atlanta was dining at the desolate Mexican restaurant down the street from Hard Rock Cafe. The service was speedy, the food filling, and the beer on special. The TV showed a Hispanic BMX competition. Near the end of the meal, the beer started to smell like vomit, so I finished it with one big swallow and headed for the door.
Sunday, June 5, 2011
June 5, 2011
One of my favorite memories from Atlanta is the time a kind bum struck up a conversation on the MART. We talked about the Braves struggles leaving runners on base. I said the game tonight would have been 10-2 if they could just move 'em around. He said too many injuries this year.
The little fella was wearing a Jeff Gordon hat and was short a few teeth. It was hard not to like him. So an afterthought later when he scurried up the escalator to ask if I had anything to spare, I gave him 50 cents.
The little fella was wearing a Jeff Gordon hat and was short a few teeth. It was hard not to like him. So an afterthought later when he scurried up the escalator to ask if I had anything to spare, I gave him 50 cents.
Saturday, June 4, 2011
June 4, 2011
One of my favorite memories from Atlanta is the hotel room on the 56th floor. The third or fourth thing I did on entering was look out the window. There was a big mound in the hazy distance. Then I queued up four Lil Wayne songs on Youtube, took my shirt off, and jumped on the king-size bed for a minute. I think next I got a cup of water from the bathroom faucet.
Friday, June 3, 2011
June 3, 2011
Wow, today was a pretty good day. Here are two gold nuggets Flint McLaughlin shared with his audience:
"When you grow up in the Yukon with 3,000 books and an axe, you don't get to see Star Wars."
"For as good as it is in English, you really should read Aristotle's Poetics in the Ancient Greek. It is beautiful."
"When you grow up in the Yukon with 3,000 books and an axe, you don't get to see Star Wars."
"For as good as it is in English, you really should read Aristotle's Poetics in the Ancient Greek. It is beautiful."
June 2, 2011
Dang, I can't say today wasn't an alright day.
First, Flint McLaughlin told us a personal anecdote about a day he was sitting around the pool with his family...
Now, Flint has been married for 20-odd years, so he knows his wife would rather he not mix business and family time. But old Flint has his head so far up, I mean, into the game that he's learned to coyly steal glances at his iPhone. And on this particular day... you'll never believe it... Flint received... an email. An email... from a business associate.
Now, I don't know about you, but receiving emails has never been so exhilirating in my experience. It would probably be more fun to do a cannonball or dive to the bottom of the pool for those ring toys.
Flint later handed the mike over to Boris Grinkot. Boris emphasized the importance of communication with a slide that said communication. Here's Boris:
First, Flint McLaughlin told us a personal anecdote about a day he was sitting around the pool with his family...
Now, Flint has been married for 20-odd years, so he knows his wife would rather he not mix business and family time. But old Flint has his head so far up, I mean, into the game that he's learned to coyly steal glances at his iPhone. And on this particular day... you'll never believe it... Flint received... an email. An email... from a business associate.
Now, I don't know about you, but receiving emails has never been so exhilirating in my experience. It would probably be more fun to do a cannonball or dive to the bottom of the pool for those ring toys.
Flint later handed the mike over to Boris Grinkot. Boris emphasized the importance of communication with a slide that said communication. Here's Boris:
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